Punishment Trucks

Today they forced me out in what we call the punishment truck, or the agency drivers truck in many places except we don’t do agency.

My only crime is having the audacity to comply with the TM’s insistance that my regular truck go in for it’s 6 weekly.

She’s not that bad actually, you have to wipe your feet when you get out & peel your hands off the steering wheel, but to say she’s a right SLAG (everyone in the yards ‘had’ her) she’s in pretty good shape . . . Oh, & she’s a manual, for you chaps that like that sort of left hand thing.

My main & only gripe is that the drivers seat is FUBAR & I’m talking backache central here, it really should have been relegated to the dentists waiting room a long time ago.

In passing & after throwing him his daily allowance of raw meat, I jokingly asked our semi-tame fitter "why can’t you just swap it for the passenger seat . . . Which has been sat on approx’ 3 (THREE) times since she left the production line all those years ago ?

Now here’s a brilliant idea for those hunchbacked, knuckle dragging, 4’ tall blobs of snot that design the ergonomics of our cabs. Make it so the passenger seat can replace the drivers seat one day, 'cos it’s obviously impossible to make a drivers seat that lasts longer than 10yrs/500 000mls.

That is all.

Dork Lard:
Today they forced me out in what we call the punishment truck, or the agency drivers truck in many places except we don’t do agency.

My only crime is having the audacity to comply with the TM’s insistance that my regular truck go in for it’s 6 weekly.

She’s not that bad actually, you have to wipe your feet when you get out & peel your hands off the steering wheel, but to say she’s a right SLAG (everyone in the yards ‘had’ her) she’s in pretty good shape . . . Oh, & she’s a manual, for you chaps that like that sort of left hand thing.

My main & only gripe is that the drivers seat is FUBAR & I’m talking backache central here, it really should have been relegated to the dentists waiting room a long time ago.

In passing & after throwing him his daily allowance of raw meat, I jokingly asked our semi-tame fitter "why can’t you just swap it for the passenger seat . . . Which has been sat on approx’ 3 (THREE) times since she left the production line all those years ago ?

Now here’s a brilliant idea for those hunchbacked, knuckle dragging, 4’ tall blobs of snot that design the ergonomics of our cabs. Make it so the passenger seat can replace the drivers seat one day, 'cos it’s obviously impossible to make a drivers seat that lasts longer than 10yrs/500 000mls.

That is all.

No need, self driv8ng trucks are coming!!

Buggered driver’s seat, its got to be a Scania.

DAF & Merc were the 2 marques that I found had seats that wore quickly. The DAF lateral supports regularly used to start slipping/failing after about 200k.

Dork Lard:
Today they forced me out in what we call the punishment truck, or the agency drivers truck in many places except we don’t do agency.

My only crime is having the audacity to comply with the TM’s insistance that my regular truck go in for it’s 6 weekly.

She’s not that bad actually, you have to wipe your feet when you get out & peel your hands off the steering wheel, but to say she’s a right SLAG (everyone in the yards ‘had’ her) she’s in pretty good shape . . . Oh, & she’s a manual, for you chaps that like that sort of left hand thing.

My main & only gripe is that the drivers seat is FUBAR & I’m talking backache central here, it really should have been relegated to the dentists waiting room a long time ago.

In passing & after throwing him his daily allowance of raw meat, I jokingly asked our semi-tame fitter "why can’t you just swap it for the passenger seat . . . Which has been sat on approx’ 3 (THREE) times since she left the production line all those years ago ?

Now here’s a brilliant idea for those hunchbacked, knuckle dragging, 4’ tall blobs of snot that design the ergonomics of our cabs. Make it so the passenger seat can replace the drivers seat one day, 'cos it’s obviously impossible to make a drivers seat that lasts longer than 10yrs/500 000mls.

That is all.

My Scania drivers seat has seen in 900,000 miles and thus far looks as good as new. Leather clad though so presumably higher spec than your gripe is aimed at.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Wiretwister:
DAF & Merc were the 2 marques that I found had seats that wore quickly. The DAF lateral supports regularly used to start slipping/failing after about 200k.

Yep, my money is on a knackered old DAF :grimacing:

Come on Dork Lad, what make of wagon is it? We are taking bets here…

eagerbeaver:

Wiretwister:
DAF & Merc were the 2 marques that I found had seats that wore quickly. The DAF lateral supports regularly used to start slipping/failing after about 200k.

Yep, my money is on a knackered old DAF :grimacing:

Come on Dork Lad, what make of wagon is it? We are taking bets here…

Early Scania R series is my bet. You only have to pass wind violently for a bit of it to break.

I remember working for a haulier many years ago, he had an old well used Renault R310 to shunt between 2 factory sites, it was a heap and you only got it when your truck was being prepped for test, but it did have character and you knew you’d be starting at 8 and finish at 5.
In the morning you’d go in start it up and get a brew as you couldn’t see the truck for the smoke, once the smoke had cleared drive to factory, wait about in office for a trailer, drink more coffee, take trailer to other factory about an hour away, driving it was an experience, steering was more a general guide it in the right direction than actually a positive steering response, cab suspension was shot and it was on springs so it sort of rattled and swayed around and when you stopped at a set of lights you’d watch steam and smoke gently waft from the front of the truck and listen to it hiss and groan.
It was an experience and the most amazing thing was it really made you appreciate getting your G290 back from the workshop. :laughing:

Dork Lard:
Today they forced me out in what we call the punishment truck, or the agency drivers truck in many places except we don’t do agency.

My only crime is having the audacity to comply with the TM’s insistance that my regular truck go in for it’s 6 weekly.

She’s not that bad actually, you have to wipe your feet when you get out & peel your hands off the steering wheel, but to say she’s a right SLAG (everyone in the yards ‘had’ her) she’s in pretty good shape . . . Oh, & she’s a manual, for you chaps that like that sort of left hand thing.

My main & only gripe is that the drivers seat is FUBAR & I’m talking backache central here, it really should have been relegated to the dentists waiting room a long time ago.

In passing & after throwing him his daily allowance of raw meat, I jokingly asked our semi-tame fitter "why can’t you just swap it for the passenger seat . . . Which has been sat on approx’ 3 (THREE) times since she left the production line all those years ago ?

Now here’s a brilliant idea for those hunchbacked, knuckle dragging, 4’ tall blobs of snot that design the ergonomics of our cabs. Make it so the passenger seat can replace the drivers seat one day, 'cos it’s obviously impossible to make a drivers seat that lasts longer than 10yrs/500 000mls.

That is all.

I would love to know what its like when you go for a interview for a job
Have you got any questions yes I do what trucks do you have and how old are they because I can’t drive anything over ten years old and what make is the truck because there are some i won’t drive because i just can’t drive them
OK driver we will do up a contract that says all you require and give you a new truck every year how is that
That’s great but if I put on weight in between the year could we change that to every 6 months
No problem driver we are here to make sure your every need is looked after, please will you take the job please please

Had to put up with a horrid Daf manual truck for two days. biting point was high on the clutch and the pedal so stiff it gave me a limp for a few days. Also you had to slap the gear stick to knock it out gear or to make sure it was in neutral. If you wanted to put it in reverse two hands were required. Was a bit of fun though; Glad i’m back in the auto now though.

Put a volvo seat in it and be done.

It’s simple to work out what make of truck it is by the type of faults, eg:

DAF - lots of wind noise sounds like window slightly open, lots of bits don’t quite work, brakes…who needs brakes!?
Merc - auto gearbox takes a week to decide what it’s doing but most stuff will work…just.
Scania - everything will be glued on or selotaped inside and it’ll feel like something that came out of the old USSR
Renault - will tell you the coolant level is low always and older ones cycle through many errors, but it’ll still go.
Volvo - perfect although you’re now 3 hours late having played with the dimable lighting controls for too long! :slight_smile:

Overall, I’d vote Scania if it’s the punishment truck. Even got to drive one with 1000KM on the clock recently and it was cheap, nasty, several things didn’t work properly including cig lighter voltage regulation and it rattled worse than a DAF. What happened to Scania??

I was in an RDC waiting room today and I listened with quiet amusement as two 25-stone fat knackers complained that their driver’s seats were broken. I didn’t say anything.

Harry Monk:
I was in an RDC waiting room today and I listened with quiet amusement as two 25-stone fat knackers complained that their driver’s seats were broken. I didn’t say anything.

If it doesn’t work out in road haulage there’s a place in the diplomatic corp with your name on it :grimacing:

Daf makes the nicest seats but I can’t hack their jerky gearboxes and heavy steering.

SouthEastCashew:
Daf makes the nicest seats but I can’t hack their jerky gearboxes and heavy steering.

Nah you want a volvo pad under yer arris! Deffo not an Iveco though!

Concretejim:
Put a volvo seat in it and be done.

Not so sure.

I currently pilot a 12 year old FH, just 10k under 1m, and the seat base is torn and the back of the drivers seat has come adrift.

Ken.

trevHCS:
It’s simple to work out what make of truck it is by the type of faults, eg:

DAF - lots of wind noise sounds like window slightly open, lots of bits don’t quite work, brakes…who needs brakes!?
Merc - auto gearbox takes a week to decide what it’s doing but most stuff will work…just.
Scania - everything will be glued on or selotaped inside and it’ll feel like something that came out of the old USSR
Renault - will tell you the coolant level is low always and older ones cycle through many errors, but it’ll still go.
Volvo - perfect although you’re now 3 hours late having played with the dimable lighting controls for too long! :slight_smile:

Overall, I’d vote Scania if it’s the punishment truck. Even got to drive one with 1000KM on the clock recently and it was cheap, nasty, several things didn’t work properly including cig lighter voltage regulation and it rattled worse than a DAF. What happened to Scania??

You clearly haven’t driven an IVECO then.

Ken.

muckles:
It was an experience and the most amazing thing was it really made you appreciate getting your G290 back from the workshop. :laughing:

That R310 really must have been bad then :grimacing:

Between 88-90 i worked for Jack Richards, had a F10 and when that went in for its 6 weekly the usual handout was a very old ERF (that being bad enough) it had the Rolls 265 Eagle fitted, couldnt wait to get the Ovlov back… :smiley:

Quinny:

Concretejim:
Put a volvo seat in it and be done.

Not so sure.

I currently pilot a 12 year old FH, just 10k under 1m, and the seat base is torn and the back of the drivers seat has come adrift.

Ken.

I think seat condition in an old truck is as much down to the previous drivers and the type of work they did as much as design and build quality.
The last race team I was at we had an FH with over a million Kms on it but the seat was still in good nick and didn’t leave you doubled up in pain after a full days driving.
Seen other trucks of all makes where the seat has been knackered in a year due to the oversized driver or because it’s been on multi drop work.