So......Brexit

To sum up for those that don’t understand…

Imagine you are seeing a girl,you decide you don’t want to see her anymore so you tell your friends (the British public) that you are going to dump her…turns out she won’t let you and you are actually very scared of her so you decide to stay with her,she lets you pretend to your friends (the British public)that you had a chat and agreed to stay together on the condition she lets you control you own doings,but in reality she owns you and you’ll do everything she says.

I think that’s about it.

Very succinctly put - spot on!

Steve

(you forgot to mention increasing her expenses allowance but giving up the ■■■!)

So…

She got screwed and didn’t like it?

We got screwed and got bored of it?

Everyone got screwed?

Does she have a sister?

I think every one has got a bum deal out of this , retainers and brexiters

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Or…

You are a five-year-old child.

You have a hizzy-fit and decide you are going to leave home…

You go out in the garden, and hear your Mum click the door shut behind you.

You panic, soil yourself and hammer on the door asking to be let back in.

I guess that’s what happened to the brave ‘no-dealers’. :smiley:

You want to dump your girlfriend, but you want to carry on having ■■■ with her.

She works as a prostitute, so agrees to keep having ■■■ with you, for which you duly cough up - but everyone else gets told “you two are still dating”.

To truly break with your girlfriend then - you really need to discover that “going without ■■■■■■” for a while is a price worth paying for being shot of her overspending ways, gawdy habits, and downright hostility towards your friends and foes alike, who all give you stick for “paying to be treated badly” as you do.

SELF RESTRAINT then - is the key to getting what you want in life.

“They who can destroy a thing - are the only ones who’ll ever have true control over that thing”.

Dump your girlfriend, change your locks, change your phone number, and burn your phone.

If she hangs around outside your place of work - change your job as well, without telling anyone where you are going.

“HARD” Dumping - works.

“Soft” Dumping - leaves you in a position where you are still skint every friday, still paying for ■■■■■■, but not allowed to form or even look for new encounters with the opposite ■■■.

She not only controls you - she is pimping YOU for “Immoral Earnings” as it is off-record, leaving her open to claim both benefits, and get maintenence from the kid she says is yours, but could be anyone’s by this point.

Stop being a mug - and discover your RIght Hand - assuming you’re too ugly to find a new girlfriend with any speed. :stuck_out_tongue:

Power to the Fist!

yourhavingalarf:
So…

She got screwed and didn’t like it?

We got screwed and got bored of it?

Everyone got screwed?

Does she have a sister?

MC to Streetwalker:

“Who would you like to see take power at the next election Ms Whiplash?”

Ms Whiplash:

“Well, I’ve spent my entire adult life not worrying who gets in and screws me, so why should I start worrying now?”

You have a girl friend.
The two of you make plans for the future and decide to live together so take out a joint mortgage. You live together for years and rub along. It’s not always a honeymoon, and sometimes you gotta cut the grass or wash the dishes.
Your mate down the pub, Nigel, says to you:
“I can fix you up with a much better girl. No mortgage, she’ll do anything you want. She’s prettier and she’s available now.”
So you dump your girl.
Are you surprised she wants you to pay the mortgage until she sorts her finances out? Do you really think these prettier girls are all waiting just for a guy like you who drops partners on a whim?
And where is Nigel when you want an introduction to this desirable girl who no one else is going out with at the moment?
He’s stopped drinking in your pub, and is telling his buddies Don and Vlad about how he has helped you improve your life!

Edit. It’s true you’re no longer paying a mortgage. You don’t have to cut the grass. But no one is making your tea and you’re now living alone in a bedsit.

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Franglais:
You have a girl friend.
The two of you make plans for the future and decide to live together so take out a joint mortgage. You live together for years and rub along. It’s not always a honeymoon, and sometimes you gotta cut the grass or wash the dishes.
Your mate down the pub, Nigel, says to you:
“I can fix you up with a much better girl. No mortgage, she’ll do anything you want. She’s prettier and she’s available now.”
So you dump your girl.
Are you surprised she wants you to pay the mortgage until she sorts her finances out? Do you really think these prettier girls are all waiting just for a guy like you who drops partners on a whim?
And where is Nigel when you want an introduction to this desirable girl who no one else is going out with at the moment?
He’s stopped drinking in your pub, and is telling his buddies Don and Vlad about how he has helped you improve your life!

Edit. It’s true you’re no longer paying a mortgage. You don’t have to cut the grass. But no one is making your tea and you’re now living alone in a bedsit.

The reality is that the ‘girl’ is actually just a neighbour who the whole household including the wife were on friendly terms with.That was until ‘she’ turned out to be a transgender he with stalking and bullying tendencies including demanding money with menaces.Yes it’s true that two of the sons living here had designs on ‘her’ even to the point of still fancying her after it was found out that she is really a he and them somehow convincing us that it’s a good idea to sign over the deeds of our house so that she ( he ) could use it and share ownership of it as she ( he ) chooses and provide keys and take down the garden fence to give her ( him ) and all her ( his ) friends access to the house and the garden.Not to mention buying loads of their unwanted junk at the regular car boot sales which they hold in our driveway and keeping up the regular payments regarding the aforementioned demands for money with menaces and running the house according to her ( his ) not our wishes.

The arguments between us are ongoing as to whether this is actually a good deal for us to the point of telling the two deluded sons if they fancy her ( him ) that much then zb off and live with her ( him ) and we want our house back.At which point the sons do their usual sulking act and start waving the compromised altered deeds of the house around telling us that it’s in our interests and it’s the best deal that we are going to get.

You’re in a civil partnership with your ‘husband’,
You’re unhappy at how he makes all the rules, spends a lot of your money without showing where it’s been spent, and influences your penal system in ways you don’t like. So you tell him you want to leave, and he fears losing your money and easy access to all your points of entry. He intentionally confuses, bullies, and frightens you, convincing you you’ll ‘never find a husband like him again’ and that you’ll be worse off. But his real agenda is to keep shafting you, so you cut him a deal that’s not technically marriage, but gives him continued access through the back door.

ezydriver:
You’re in a civil partnership with your ‘husband’,
You’re unhappy at how he makes all the rules, spends a lot of your money without showing where it’s been spent, and influences your penal system in ways you don’t like. So you tell him you want to leave, and he fears losing your money and easy access to all your points of entry. He intentionally confuses, bullies, and frightens you, convincing you you’ll ‘never find a husband like him again’ and that you’ll be worse off. But his real agenda is to keep shafting you, so you cut him a deal that’s not technically marriage, but gives him continued access through the back door.

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Franglais:
You have a girl friend.
The two of you make plans for the future and decide to live together so take out a joint mortgage. You live together for years and rub along. It’s not always a honeymoon, and sometimes you gotta cut the grass or wash the dishes.
Your mate down the pub, Nigel, says to you:
“I can fix you up with a much better girl. No mortgage, she’ll do anything you want. She’s prettier and she’s available now.”
So you dump your girl.
Are you surprised she wants you to pay the mortgage until she sorts her finances out? Do you really think these prettier girls are all waiting just for a guy like you who drops partners on a whim?
And where is Nigel when you want an introduction to this desirable girl who no one else is going out with at the moment?
He’s stopped drinking in your pub, and is telling his buddies Don and Vlad about how he has helped you improve your life!

Edit. It’s true you’re no longer paying a mortgage. You don’t have to cut the grass. But no one is making your tea and you’re now living alone in a bedsit.

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Then you go round to your ex’s place, and find Don and Vald in bed with her while Nige watches through a window and fiddles with his winkey

A colourful allegory but would’t it be clearer to point out that inside the EU we have better terms and conditions of employment, better food and national security, better healthcare and better education than if we leave.

Optimum:
A colourful allegory but would’t it be clearer to point out that inside the EU we have better terms and conditions of employment, better food and national security, better healthcare and better education than if we leave.

It would of course all be true.
But if anyone points out any good points of the EU they are told it’s all “fake news”. If anyone points out any downsides to Brexit it’s “project fear”.

There are debatable points on both sides, But attempting to discuss them rationally doesn’t often get far.

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GasGas:
Or…

You are a five-year-old child.

You have a hizzy-fit and decide you are going to leave home…

You go out in the garden, and hear your Mum click the door shut behind you.

You panic, soil yourself and hammer on the door asking to be let back in.

I guess that’s what happened to the brave ‘no-dealers’. :smiley:

Well said and so simple for all to understand :smiley: :smiley:
Here is my tuppence worth for what its worth:
Leavers, you’ve all been stupidly misled throughout the whole campaign and look at where it’s got us.
I hope we can learn a lesson from all this mess and that is to never ever vote ■■■■■■■ Tory again, how anybody can trust this ■■■■■■■■■ of a party is inexcusably laughable. 8 years of pain and our suffering is about to get worse.

Optimum:
A colourful allegory but would’t it be clearer to point out that inside the EU we have better terms and conditions of employment, better food and national security, better healthcare and better education than if we leave.

Better terms and conditions of employment for the Employers you mean.You know stuff like Thatcher’s union ‘reforms’ which are so much better for the workers than the powers the unions had before 1973.Wages at lower levels in real terms than then and great advances like zero hours contracts.Then added to by the transfer of industry to Europe and free movement of low wage expectation East Euro workers.Better National security only if you’re on the side of the EU Federal army stamping the EU’s authority over us and looking for trouble with Russia.Better health care you mean the NHS under funding crisis among other austerity measures because too much Brit cash is going into the EU and having to pay for our EU trade deficit instead.Better education yes if you mean Brit youth being indoctrinated with loads of pro Federalist EU propaganda.

jamdoms:
Here is my tuppence worth for what its worth:
Leavers, you’ve all been stupidly misled throughout the whole campaign and look at where it’s got us.
I hope we can learn a lesson from all this mess and that is to never ever vote [zb] Tory again, how anybody can trust this [zb] of a party is inexcusably laughable. 8 years of pain and our suffering is about to get worse.

It was all so much better under Blair.

We weren’t misled at all.What actually happened was a sham referendum set up by EU Federalists like Cameron,May and Hammond for EU Federalists.To seal us into the EU if they won.With the win win of removing UKIP from the EU ‘parliament’,if they lost.On that note remainers pretending that the Cons aren’t on their side in all this and that May isn’t working for them is laughable.When this is a very similar deal to the soft Brexit that Labour remainers led by Starmer were hoping for.If it wasn’t we’d now be seeing Labour Bolshevik mob rule on the streets.

But yes the Cons always live up to their name which makes any difference to the entrenched Starmer v Batten argument,that will inevitably follow the predictable end game of remainer May’s plan,how.

No deal - has yet to be both on the table, and actually in a position to be implemented.

As a ■■■■■■■■ Brexiteer, I would have been happy with “no deal” at ANY point along the way, realizing that you cannot actually ever get permission to do a thing that the other side will not allow in a million years.

It’s like trying to negotiate with Hitler to “not bomb London” by offering payments FFS.

Has anyone heard of “Danegeld” around here?

The very concept should be a thousand years out-of-date in politics now. :unamused:

Today’s politics is more like “Poker” than “Fearmongering”.

If you don’t give a ■■■■ about the downside consequences of your move - then you stand a better chance of winning in any situation as a result, regardless of “what hand you hold.”

All we needed to do for Hard Brexit all along - was cease payments to Brussels. Forget about “laws being broken” - because the rest of the world will judge Britain rightly or wrongly for tearing up any and all EU treaties that held sway up to that point.
Germany considered it legal to invade Poland in 1939. Britian considered it not only illegal, but triggering a treaty between Poland and Britain at the time.
Britain chose to go to war over it, Hitler never declared war on Britain, contrary to popular belief.
Britain’s declaration of war against Germany was considered illegal by all those countries that chose to remain neutral in WWII, that could have come to our aid, but chose not to, unsure of the legal position in the bigger world picture. (Not including those nations like Spain that were unable to join the war, because there was already a civil war in play at the time…)

Back to this “draft deal”, already long described by Boris Johnson as being a “turd”…
What’s the £39billion for again?
Nothing at all. The EU have asked for it, nay demanded it - but we are under no legal obligation whatsoever to pay for it, or any other amount.
We ARE under legal obligation to keep on paying to Brussels - all the while we “remain” in the single market and customs union though, hence why we MUST ditch BOTH.

It’s like asking for a refund at the football match, before the game has started, but you are still occupying your bloody grandstand position at the ground!
Remove yourself from what you are paying for, put it “beyond reach to U-turn back again”, and then ask for a refund, because a proverbial season ticket at Norwich United happens to NOT be worth ten grand per season, and demand that refund accordingly… :stuck_out_tongue:

Eu Prison.jpg

The door is already open as a result of the referendum result.
Now it is time to “stop worrying about getting a detention” for escaping from Colditz FFS.

Getting out is FAR more important than “obeying any rules” not made by the UK in the first place. :bulb:

So we leave the EU without agreement, and revert to WTO rules.

What can go wrong?

Quite a lot actually

economist.com/britain/2017/ … fine-wrong

xichrisxi:
To sum up for those that don’t understand…

Here we sit, broken hearted, told May to zb, she only ■■■■■■.