Disappointed!!!!!!

Anyone else on here disappointed with their son/daughters choice of partner?

Both my daughters have some how ended up with blokes, who, in my opinion are a pair of wasters. The eldest girl has been with her bloke about 5 years now, the only positive i can think of for him is at least he has a job, he works away Mon-Fri, i’ve nicknamed him Mr Charisma, cos he lacks a personality, he’s very fond of the pub on weekends, usually with his mates, & if they’re not about he’ll go on his own.

My youngest daughters b/f is a complete moron, no job, no ambition, no prospects, a complete loser. The youngest girl is due to drop this week, & they’re in the process of moving into a new place. In the past 9 months he’s spent very little on the baby, a couple of bottles & outfits etc, but nothing substantial. He did get about £1500 off his father not long ago, but he spent that on a 2.9ltr BMW, which he wrote off a couple of weeks ago when he was ■■■■■■■

Since both girls are in their 20’s & capable of making their own minds up i’ve kept my mouth shut & let them get on with it, anyone have the same problem? & is there ever a time when you think you should step in & say something to your son/daughter?

If i’m honest i’d like to have a ‘quiet’ word with both b/f’s, but i know i’d end up smacking them both, & violence should never be the answer, should it?

Been there done that

My daughter is now 23 with 2 kids under 5 by the same waste of space father who she married … TWICE !!

You cannot TELL them because they just do the opposite - all you can do is to calmly give your opinion and then keep the door open for when it goes wrong

I got 2 great grandkids and she is a great mother to them - thats the upside

My daughter is only 2 years old but I get the feeling that no-one will ever be good enough for my daughter. I’m really big on the man providing for his family and in months where there isn’t much work and overtime I feel like I have let my family down by not earning the cash to enjoy our time off together. My wife works for herself as and when but with a 13week old son it isnt very oftern at the minute. I can imagine what its going to be like when she is 17 or 18 and brings round her first boyfriend and to be honest if he is a prick I will chuck him out the house if he doesnt have a job I’ll tell him that I don’t think he is good enough to be with my daughter I’ll also ask him what he has to offer to her and why she should be with him. If his answer is I’ve got a 10 inch nob I’ll chop the ■■■■■■ off for him. I can see it causing MASSIVE arguements in 15 years but I would like to think my farther in-law thinks that I’m no too bad of a son in-law and good enough for his daughter. In reality your daughters are probably scared of being lonely. Either that or you future so in-laws are hung like a donkey

I am absolutely terrified of this scenario. My daughter is nearly five and I am already living in fear of these kinds of problems.

I have no magic answer or suggestions, you certainly have my sympathy.

Only thing I can think to do is keep telling my girl how important preparing yourself for the future is, both in education and important life choices like partners etc.

A good ‘word’ goes a long way Regarding the wife and a previous boyfriend, the father in law took him to one side and wrote his name on a shotgun shell, face was a picture aparantly lol

This is why I’m glad I have 2 Boys. Don’t think anyone would be good enough for any daughter of mine.

I have 2 caughters, 1 married the other at home. They both had the sense not to bring any lads home. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do about their choices. I think it’s the job of parents to let them get on with it and be on hand when/ if it goes pear shaped. It’s their choice and if you try to interfere it makes it worse. As long as they are happy and getting on with life it’s up to them. Just as long as it doesn’t get physical, then everything changes.

My daughter is now with a very nice lad works very laid back attitude so good for her & yep I do get on well with him but have know him longer than she has although she has had some right ones in the past but you just have to let them make there own mistakes be there to pick up if things go pear shaped

My son has a very nice g/f they have been together 6 years got engaged last year get on well with her

I got 2 daughters, 13 & 14. Just the other week there was a watershed moment when I answered the door to some scrawny Herbert asking ‘Is Sophie in?’ First time it’s happened. It took all my will power to call her downstairs when all I wanted to do was tip him head first into the wheelie bin. I made her talk to him on the doorstep, no way was he coming in.

Turns out he’s in her class and he needed to borrow a book. Aye well, maybe, but I remember what I was like at his age. All hormones and hard on’s. He’s staying on the [zb]ing doorstep.

DaiDap:
I got 2 daughters, 13 & 14. Just the other week there was a watershed moment when I answered the door to some scrawny Herbert asking ‘Is Sophie in?’ First time it’s happened. It took all my will power to call her downstairs when all I wanted to do was tip him head first into the wheelie bin. I made her talk to him on the doorstep, no way was he coming in.

Turns out he’s in her class and he needed to borrow a book. Aye well, maybe, but I remember what I was like at his age. All hormones and hard on’s. He’s staying on the [zb]ing doorstep.

Betty Swallox:
Anyone else on here disappointed with their son/daughters choice of partner?

Both my daughters have some how ended up with blokes, who, in my opinion are a pair of wasters. The eldest girl has been with her bloke about 5 years now, the only positive i can think of for him is at least he has a job, he works away Mon-Fri, i’ve nicknamed him Mr Charisma, cos he lacks a personality, he’s very fond of the pub on weekends, usually with his mates, & if they’re not about he’ll go on his own.

My youngest daughters b/f is a complete moron, no job, no ambition, no prospects, a complete loser. The youngest girl is due to drop this week, & they’re in the process of moving into a new place. In the past 9 months he’s spent very little on the baby, a couple of bottles & outfits etc, but nothing substantial. He did get about £1500 off his father not long ago, but he spent that on a 2.9ltr BMW, which he wrote off a couple of weeks ago when he was ■■■■■■■

Since both girls are in their 20’s & capable of making their own minds up i’ve kept my mouth shut & let them get on with it, anyone have the same problem? & is there ever a time when you think you should step in & say something to your son/daughter?

If i’m honest i’d like to have a ‘quiet’ word with both b/f’s, but i know i’d end up smacking them both, & violence should never be the answer, should it?

I empathise with you BS. My daughter is 22, at Uni, and her boyfriend of nearly 4 years can sometimes be a right plank, then other times he amazes both my wife and I by doing something so kind and thoughtful that you’d think that they were different peoples behaviour. They think the world of each other and we just have to accept it.

A previous “acquaintance” of hers treated her like a [zb] slave. In the end I had a word with my daughter, not the boyfriend, and ended up asking her if she thought she was likely to spend the rest of her life with this toerag and if she thought he was as good as she deserved. In the end he got the elbow and we mopped the tears. One thing try not to be critical of the person only the behaviours and keep your own emotions in check, at 20something if they don’t know you care about them by now it’s probably to late to convince her.

Eldest has been with Garfield for 5 years (he’s lazy and Ginger), He has the personality of a housebrick, but the brick has a better work ethic, he works 10 hours a week in a supermarket and isnt going to bother getting a job until next year, I cannot stand him, everytime I see him (I go out of my way to avoid him) my anger and frustration towards him grows.
She is at Uni part time and works very little in a pub (single digit hours a week). Lazy cow, perfect for each other then.

The youngest has just turned 18, is at college full time and has just landed her 2nd job (evening in a restaurant), she doesnt have a BF at the moment, not enough hours in a week for her to have one, keep up the good work kid

I grab the dog leads and take my lurcher and two whippets for a walk, a very long, long walk,

aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“NO COMMENT”

I have this on the wedding video & it still makes me chuckle on the odd occasions it’s mentioned at family gatherings.

When I gave away daughter No’ 1 it was to a chap she’d met at Uni while they were both studying to be vets. Despite her protestations that " he’s the one daddy, the one you’ve always told me about" I friggin hated the pratt.

He stood up to give his speech at the reception, went through all the formalities as normal, then finally . . .

“I’d especially like to thank my new father in law, may I call you dad, for seemingly always needing to be cleaning his shotguns at the kitchen table whenever I called for Alison. I thank you Sir, dad, for telling me without words, just how special she is”.

I still hate the runt, but I have to give him a nod for his perception.

Slackbladder:
I have 2 caughters, 1 married the other at home. They both had the sense not to bring any lads home. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do about their choices. I think it’s the job of parents to let them get on with it and be on hand when/ if it goes pear shaped. It’s their choice and if you try to interfere it makes it worse. As long as they are happy and getting on with life it’s up to them. Just as long as it doesn’t get physical, then everything changes.

If i had a kid and that happens he will soon know about it

My girl isn’t a teenager yet, but I already make a thing of pointing out to her “Life’s Losers” as we walk down the street. Very likely she’ll not bother with blokes at all until she goes to University, since that’s the way she’s been brought up.

Likewise, I’d not expect her to insist on driving before age 25, nor running up a debt, nor taking drugs either.

Alcohol and Smoking are another matter. That’ll be down to the crowd she hangs out with come the hour. I used to smoke like a chimney, and I still like a dram or six on my days off as well, so I can’t really object to her experimenting in these areas.

I’ve told her the most dangerous thing anyone can do with their life is “Be an Idiot”. Avoid that, and life’s grand, regardless of what it throws at you. That’s what’s kept ME going over the years when I’ve seen those better off and higher up the ladder than me totally fall apart because they can’t handle “change” in their lives.

As for ‘dating an idiot’ - I can’t see that happening if she doesn’t mix with that kind of crowd to start with!
She won’t be doing “Media Studies” or “Art History” and other bullcrap waste-of-space subjects at university - put it that way!

Chas:
I have this on the wedding video & it still makes me chuckle on the odd occasions it’s mentioned at family gatherings.

When I gave away daughter No’ 1 it was to a chap she’d met at Uni while they were both studying to be vets. Despite her protestations that " he’s the one daddy, the one you’ve always told me about" I friggin hated the pratt.

He stood up to give his speech at the reception, went through all the formalities as normal, then finally . . .

“I’d especially like to thank my new father in law, may I call you dad, for seemingly always needing to be cleaning his shotguns at the kitchen table whenever I called for Alison. I thank you Sir, dad, for telling me without words, just how special she is”.

I still hate the runt, but I have to give him a nod for his perception.

How DO you hate someone that perceptive?
How would he have to have been different to have “got on with you” in the first instance?
Please don’t tell me “He supports city instead of United” or something like that!

If i ever have a daughter she will wear a chastity belt her whole life!

Betty Swallox:
Anyone else on here disappointed with their son/daughters choice of partner?

Both my daughters have some how ended up with blokes, who, in my opinion are a pair of wasters. The eldest girl has been with her bloke about 5 years now, the only positive i can think of for him is at least he has a job, he works away Mon-Fri, i’ve nicknamed him Mr Charisma, cos he lacks a personality, he’s very fond of the pub on weekends, usually with his mates, & if they’re not about he’ll go on his own.

My youngest daughters b/f is a complete moron, no job, no ambition, no prospects, a complete loser. The youngest girl is due to drop this week, & they’re in the process of moving into a new place. In the past 9 months he’s spent very little on the baby, a couple of bottles & outfits etc, but nothing substantial. He did get about £1500 off his father not long ago, but he spent that on a 2.9ltr BMW, which he wrote off a couple of weeks ago when he was ■■■■■■■

Since both girls are in their 20’s & capable of making their own minds up i’ve kept my mouth shut & let them get on with it, anyone have the same problem? & is there ever a time when you think you should step in & say something to your son/daughter?

If i’m honest i’d like to have a ‘quiet’ word with both b/f’s, but i know i’d end up smacking them both, & violence should never be the answer, should it?

I honestly don’t see your problem with your 1st example?

But the 2nd sounds like he’s a dosser and a ■■■■■■.

But, as you said, both girls in their 20’s, make their own choices mate.

Been with my g/f since she was 16 - 14 1/2 years , mother hated / hates my guts, I was friends with her brother through school, we got into mischief, bikes on rough ground, arrested etc, you know, we were kids. Mother still sees me the same, do I give a flying ■■■■■

Must say though, at the moment, anyone interested in a 30yr old with lots of baggage but no kids, she’s free to a (was going to say good) home
Bloody horse, 2 dogs, cat, job with hours that collide with mine, feel like I’m just paying to have a lodger living here

I can still remember being told by a girl’s father that I wouldn’t be good enough for one of his daughters,even if she’d have fancied me,because I was a truck driver and truck drivers earn zb all and are never home even though the first issue wasn’t that bad and I only ever did uk work,who was then as happy as pig in zb when his other daughter then married a bloke in the navy who was away for months at a time.

The whole subject to me is as much a load of hypocritical bs a all the other types of bs obstacles like the age thing etc etc that seem to be applied by over interested fathers in what/who their daughters do and choose in life.In many,if not most cases,those same fathers would probably still be single and childless themselves if their own wives fathers had been as full of bs as they themselves apply in the case of their own daughters choices later.

The way the economy is now the job thing is as much bs as all the rest because the job situation and job security are virtually non existent in the new order global free market economy and although someone might have a decent job today they could be down the job centre the day after having to take whatever is on offer.Which fits those old marriage vows for better or worse for richer or poorer and a decent marriage should be based on nothing more than the fact that the bloke loves the girl and she loves him.But then what are marriage vows worth these days.