I wasn’t going to post anything, but just felt like letting go.
This year has been the absolute worst for us, from june onwards it’s just gone down hill. What with my mother losing 3 stone in 2 months due to a stomach problem that they still haven’t got to the bottom of, to my son having surgery for double vision which at one point looked like a brain tumour (luckily it wasn’t).
We just thought we were on the up until Monday last week, when I got a call from Mum, asking where I was. When I said I was in the yard she said can you come home, I asked why, she said because your Dad’s died! So the drive back from Brum was the longest ever, even though I did it in 1hr10.
The last 9 day’s seem like 9 years, at least my brother is back for NZ for 3 weeks to take some of the strain. But it’s an up hill battle as I have to go back to work in just over a weeks time, and I need to get the cows inside before I do. But a few good friends are helping sort that out.
I am hopefully going to carry on farming in some way, but will have to continue driving as there is no way the farm could support us full time. The biggest thing that has struck me over the past few days, is the immense responsibility I have now got. I used to walk out the farmhouse door, knowing I’d got some back up and some one making the majority of the descisions, now its all on my shoulders. I’m kind of lucky though I’ve got some good friends to turn to for help, one of them will be checking on my cows whilst I’m at work.
So I’ll still keep popping on here to see what happening, and will try and make the after Xmas do. But as you can see the sooner this year is over the better. 2008 can’t be much worse
Hi Steve,
Your situation came in 3s as they say. I’m sorry for your loss.
Please believe that I understand what that feels like.
2002 was like that for me.
First off, in the March my wife left very suddenly and totally out of the blue.
Second, in the November I found my neighbour dead. (a very good friend for 20 years.)
Last, my dad died at 1pm on Xmas day that year. I was with him until the end.
Please PM me if you think I can help.
My thoughts are with you and your family , we never now what is around the corners of life and best we do not, but its wonderful how we all seem to get the strength to carry on and support each other.
Take heart over the next few weeks, speak of your father with love often, and remember him with pride, he has just gone on ahead of you all , but he will still be around and about at times. I often get a whif of my fathers tobacco even tho there is no one but me in my home, that gives me a sense that he is still watching over me.
Best wishes to you and the family
Danneke
Sorry for your loss Steve, sometimes it’s got to bad to get better matey. Hope everything picks up for you 
