hello boys ,probably should be on another forum but i think i’d sooner ask fellow truckers , iv’e been fairly fit and healthy for most of my live ,only had the flu once,broken hand once and a broken foot, however just lately in the last three or four years life seems to be catching up with me resulting in two seperate operations to remove cancer and the loss of two toes that i broke and after 12 months they decided to remove the buggers as they was causing secondrey problems,now to the main point ,in the last two months when i sit down ,iv’e started sitting on my testacles ,i don’t know if other people suffer from this in later life so just thought i’d ask ,for most of my life iv’e worn budgie smuggler style undercrackers ,they used to keep everything nice and snug and if you needed a little scratch you just put your hand in your pocket and there they were,perfect positioning ,a few years ago ,the long haired one decided to purchase them calvin kline type things that look like skin tight shorts with a ball bag in them ,she says i look ■■■■ in them but i knew i would ,so ,i work on the four day rotation method and by day three they are quite baggy ,could this be the cause do you think,i don’t want you to think i’m not in full working order because i am still more than capable of slipping a crippler to the voice as she’s known in here ,also i don’t want you to think that when i get out of the shower that they are dragging on the floor , do i go back to budgie smugglers or use sellotape ,elastic band to take in the slack because i can’t carry on squashing the twins it.s getting uncomfortable,i’m sure the right remedy will be forhcomming from you lads as there must be a few ballcrushers on here to help, 
thanks in advance ,
ps, the scratching is a hobby by the way and not a result of anything untoward
hmmm . maybe its symptomatic of broken feet and hands as ive broke both including right hand 4 times .
think your ball carrying problem maybe loss of elasticity in ■■■■■■■■■ due to too tight budgie snugglers . i suffered this too as a result of females taking it upon themselves to do shopping .
after 3rd divorce i started buying union jack trunks from sports direct . 2 boxes for £8 . 100% cotton .
after a few months of kicking gonads with my knees , a degree of muscular integrity returned and they started residing at a more dignified altitude .
like any muscle you have to train them .
also 100% cotton has stopped em itching .
hope this helps
i was wondering could it be linked to losing two toes as i know your eyes and your arse are connected ,try pulling a hair out of your arse and see if your eyes don’t water for example , i won’t shop at sports direct but maybe i might have to relax my principals a wee bit to get me a box of them and give it a try ,thanks
just to add if you’ve been divorced three times i feel guilty asking you about my problems
the divorces were best bit of the marriages !! only cost me 2 houses .
key thing i meant to mention is to get trunks not boxers .
trunks have elasticated legs so stop your crown jewels dropping right down to your knees .
this provides a modicum of support until you have rejuvenated your natural support mechanisms .
im half minded to chop 2 toes just to test your thesis , but will wait and see if anybody else can corroborate this first
they are ok on days 1and 2 but lack said support on days 3 annd 4 and old habits are hard to change ,just wondering if a mankini would work ,on the slacker days i could give it a tug and tighten my belt a notch
This clearly sounds like a load of old ■■■■■■■■…
And a gullible fool! 
maybe it helps if you post a pics
As this is obviously a very serious matter and cause for intelligent debate,I would like to suggest wearing a jock strap or a cricket box .You would need to buy a few of them and wash regularly ,the support and the crown jewels.Its mostly age lack of muscle fibre and gravity taking charge.Think of it as a bra for your gentleman parts.Do keep us informed 
.
What a very rude thread.
I shall express my cure for a slack ■■■■■■■■■ using the medium of emoticons.
[LIPSTICK][RAISED FIST][SPLASHING SWEAT SYMBOL][FACE SAVOURING DELICIOUS FOOD]
In hindsight my emoticon attempt appears to be a little on the weak side, similar to the elastic properties of my scrotum.
Evil8Beezle:
This clearly sounds like a load of old ■■■■■■■■…
Literally!
Hmmm, will have to keep my eye on the ball with this cotton-picking thread ( seeing as they are allegedly connected 
)
I feel your pain Scrote.
Mrs Beaver and I a while back got carried away after consuming a few cans of Aldi premium, on our annual luxury break to Rhyl.
We thought it was a good idea to copulate on the shimmering sands.
But my ■■■■■■■■■ had lost a significant degree of tautness ( unknown to me at that point ), and my balls inadvertently swept a large amount of sand up trap 2.
When we got back to our B&B, erm… I mean luxury hotel, Mrs B started to undress and in doing so let rip with a huge ■■■■.
It was the one and only time I have ever been caught up in a sandstorm. Deeply unpleasant.
She’d be handy for getting paint off rusty gates and the like though Beavs
We require facts, not fantasies 
She is pretty useful to be fair mate. Local donkey sanctuary uses her services now and again.
Whenever they need to amputate the hind legs off one, they ask her to come in and chat to the poor bugger.
eagerbeaver:
She is pretty useful to be fair mate. Local donkey sanctuary uses her services now and again.
Whenever they need to amputate the hind legs off one, they ask her to come in and chat to the poor bugger.
Anyway, this is for Dipper Dave as it’s right up his…
Immigrant:
I googled around for you
bignaturaltesticles.com/testicle … -benefits/
some good advice there ,thanks for that ,i have the voice working on it as we speak